For a link regarding the inherent flaws in Right Wing Politics, click here.

Thanks to www.yoshville.com for the argument.

Spoken Word/Oratory:


This is your life.
Good to the last drop.
It doesn't get any better than this.

Sometimes we forget this simple fact, and we live unconsciously.

If you never knew that you were alive.
I mean really knew it,
you've always been dead.

Before it happens,
you'll probably look back and take stock of your life.

Leave your livestock alone and remember:

This is your life.
Good to the last drop.
It doesn't get any better than this.


This is your life.
It is right here.
All you have to do is open your eyes and look at it.


The scariest part is figuring out what you want to do before you die.

It isn't a list.
It isn't an opinion poll.
This is one,
simple,
question.

And you have to know the answer.

But first thing's first: Imagine you're dead.

If you were dead,
right now,
what do you wish you would've done before you died?

Why aren't you doing it?

We are the middle children of history, and all middle children have to find their own way.

----
This was inspired (though I certainly don't consider it inspired, I'm only saying that some of the phrases and all of the ideas came from somewhere) by Daniel Quinn and Chuck Palahniuk.

Thanks for reading. Please send questions/comments/blasphemy/small children/complaints to absh0005@umn.edu or click on the 'Email Nate' link.

Moderatly humorous tagboard activity.

Here is a transcript.

Jon: Nate, get on AIM, we got a WC3 tourny.

Cephaladon: I saw the PBS documentary, "The Elegant Universe" It Rules.

Anti-Tasha: Tasha, you are very attractive.

Anti-Tasha: In fact, Tasha, you are so attractive that I would buy you a library of magazines.

Anti-Tasha: Well, half of a library.

Anti-Tasha: Oh, what the hell. I'd get you an entire library of magazines.

Anti-Tasha: Well, I'd buy them for you if they were good magazines.

Anti-Tasha: But then I would have to ask myself (as I don't know you) whether form or content is more important, or some combination of both?

Anti-Tasha: If you value content, then I'd buy you a library of magazines with good content in them.

Anti-Tasha: On the other hand, if you value form, then I'd just buy you some flowers and point out their prettiness.

Anti-Tasha: But if you're an all-in-one woman, and value equally both form and content, then you get Cosmo.

Anti-Tasha: If Cosmo got boring, I hope that you would let me know. I could get you so many other magazines!

Anti-Tasha: Wait! Come to think about it, I would have given you an entire library of magazines, so you could pick out your own reads!

Anti-Tasha: You know, I've given it some thought, and I've decided to take back my offer of the library. I think that I'd be better off finding somebody else. Goodbye, Tasha.

Anti-Tasha: Nate, do you like magazines? ;)

HOLY DOGEATING DOGSHIT ON A STICK!

Check out those pictures. It is amazing.

So. I wrote today. I worked on a little comedy, a little fiction, and a little pretentious drivel(I have to get it out somehow). I don't really have the text handy at the moment, so I'm just going to re-write a joke I thought of today, since this site is supposed to be about my comedy.

If you don't think things written in here are quite funny, then just keep looking. If you don't think this next joke is funny, just trust me that it is utterly hilarious, and when this joke--that I will re-write later in the post--was performed live, it nearly killed five people.

I'm saying that a lot is lost in the translation.

I was just kidding, I'm not going to re-write the joke right now. I know, I know, you didn't really care. That's why I'm spiting you like this. It wouldn't be spite if it wasn't just an empty gesture.

Just so you know though, it was about bears. And really, really fucking funny.

Fuckers.

I'm currently trying to get my life back on track. This isn't the forum that I use for explaining these kinds of things (what's wrong and what I'm doing to change it) so I'll leave it at that.

Suffice it to say that something's been wrong and I'm working on fixing it.

I'm not going to go on about this, but I wanted to explain my lack of posts.

I'll have a story (probably unfinished) posted soon, or some standup that has been written but has yet to be performed, or something funny in general before the week is out.

I haven't forgotten you, the humor-seeker, the barrel rider, the riddle master. This isn't livejournal, so keep that in mind when I don't post for a while. I've been dealing with shit, and it's the kind of shit that you really don't care about.

Now, I will try to write some musings and things that are worth reading.

If you ever write fantasy, you have to realize that the poems in the world you're writing about will require much more work than the story itself, because you suck at poetry.

Mitch Hedberg was a shining star that everybody loved. His comedy was the magic kind. The kind that everybody liked. This made me angry at times, because I consider myself to be much more intelligent than some of his other fans, but now I realize that the single accomplishment of pleasing everyone who heard his acts was probably the most amazing facet of his abilities. Let's not even go into the acts themselves.

I feel like an asshole saying this, but comedy has lost a luminary. Mitch, perhaps it means nothing to you now, but you are missed by people you never knew of.

Do you like american comedy? I like american comedy. I like american comedy, baby.